If you struggle with insomnia, you probably know that the harder you try to sleep, the more riled up you get. Here are some gentler ways to approach wakeful nights.
First up is reassurance. It can help to think about a situation, or maybe more than one, that you struggled with in the past, something that felt endless, yet you found ways to move through it. Even if sleep challenges have been with you for a long time, new layers of healing and understanding are always possible. This might be a chapter that’s asking for patience and new tools, but you can learn to support yourself through it and find resources that help.
If you haven’t already, it can be helpful to rule out anything physical if you suspect that could be a factor. Sometimes lab work can identify a deficiency or excess that’s contributing to sleeplessness. You might also note when your sleep struggles began and see if something changed at that time. Occasionally, a medication or supplement can have an unexpected side effect.
Our Thoughts and Feelings
Once a physical cause is ruled out, we’re left with our thoughts and feelings.
Sometimes our body keeps us up at night because there are things we haven’t released in the light of day. Practice expressing your feelings. Write them out, talk with a trusted friend or therapist, or release them through art. See if there are buried or brewing emotions from when this issue first began that are asking for attention, expression, and compassion.
Practical Supports
Of course, there are practical supports, too, like dimming or reducing screens before bed, avoiding caffeine late in the day, or using calming herbs like lavender or chamomile.
Just as a parent might keep a diaper bag with everything their child could need, it can help to have a “go-to” bag of soothing tools by your bedside. Try preparing ahead of time with some of your favorite sleep meditations downloaded and ready to go. Many people benefit from Yoga Nidra, sound baths, and guided sleep meditations. You might even record something in your own voice to soothe yourself.
You can also record or repeat a soothing mantra to match the pace of your breathing: “Deep rest,” “I am calm and relaxed,” or “I relax and let go” are just a few examples. You can experiment until you find words that touch the right note for you.
Before bed, practice setting an intention and focus on what you desire, not what you fear. Here’s an example: I am ready to slip into a deep, peaceful sleep. I want to dream peacefully, sleep soundly, and wake feeling rested, replenished, and calm.
If it’s been a particularly challenging sleep chapter and that type of intention feels too far out of reach, you might try something along these lines: I want to be gentle with myself. I will have tools ready to turn to if I wake up. I’m teaching my body that sleep is safe.
Progressive relaxation can also help. This is when you gently tighten and release each body part. You can also try counting backward from 100 to 0. Some people find it calming to imagine their favorite teachers or comforting figures nearby, offering soothing words or energy. Our imaginations are incredibly powerful. They can scare us or soothe us, depending on how we use them.
There’s also a simple practice, drawn from ancient relaxation traditions, modern psychology, and neuroscience, where you close your eyes and gently look from side to side. Many people find this quite calming.
If you’re familiar with Donna Eden’s Eden Energy work, she and her daughters teach gentle holds on the belly, head, and hands to balance hormones and lower cortisol. You can do an easy internet search for those.
Being Gentle With Yourself
If you’ve had a rough night, try to move forward the next day without labeling yourself a “bad sleeper.” Be gentle with yourself and know that each night is a new opportunity. You can place a hand on your heart and thank your body for doing its best to protect you as you teach it new ways to rest.
If you have a sense of a higher source, Spirit, God, Light, or Love, you might ask: What am I needing to learn here? What do you want me to know? Please soothe me and guide me to the tools and resources that can best help me.
Insomnia can sometimes be the body’s way of saying that it doesn’t yet feel safe enough to fully let go and that something important is being asked for. By finding and practicing tools that resonate for your body, you can gently teach your nervous system that sleep is safe. Small, consistent rituals can help reprogram your body toward replenishing rest.
